Goodwill Spider Spot

September 30, 2024.

Tomorrow may be October 1st, but Halloween season has been high and preparations for the festivities have long begun in the aisles of store that sell useless junk. This is exciting news to many, including me, as it means toy spiders are back on the menu. At Goodwill, there was a nice selection of new Halloween decorations. Goodwill is a thrift store chain, which sells donated goods. Usually, the prices are pretty low, on account of the items being secondhand. The decorations sold at this Goodwill made me a little lightheaded when I saw their price tags. Maybe it's best to wait til after Halloween comes and goes to buy used Halloween decor for next year, rather than opting to shill for the steep prices this season.

There's a nice selection of spiders, mostly furry ones, with leg bands in many exciting colors. There are also some web decorations which look much too flimsy to support a hanging spider, but would make a nice pretend-home for one to be posed next to. Excitingly, there is also a giant cockroach, and even a giant scorpion, both born of hard plastic.

Up-close faces of the charming hairy spiders. Typical fare-- fuzzy, with reflective red eyes poking out the (presumed) front end. Not unlike last year's Hairy Spider or Gray Spider.

The giant tarantula is a large, haggard spider, the biggest of all the hairy spiders at Goodwill. Its black body grows strangely-distributed brown hair. It has cute tufts at the end of its legs, like legwarmers. The brown hair on its head is arranged similarly to a monk's tonsure. Charming pearlescent eyes peer out of the scratchy-looking mop of fur on its head.

The most exciting spider of all was this decrepit amalgam, the "Skull Spider". Its sandy-colored canvas body is covered in tattered, beige fabric. The thin bandages resemble Halloween-monster-mummy wrap, and obscure parts of its ghastly skull face. Its head resembles a human skull with its jaw dropped, screaming. Its eye sockets are painted a dark brown color, with sculpted cracks radiating out of the center of the depression. Four small holes are present in the face, one above and one below each eye socket, each painted the same dark color as the eye sockets.
The entire construction of the thing felt very flimsy, and the central body of the spider was much heavier and more robust than its weak, thin legs. It could not balance on the tips of its toes, like lighter spiders could. The skull was made of thin, hollow-sounding plastic. Its an interesting spider, poor construction aside.

The worst part of all was the price tag. Spending $30 USD on anything at Goodwill feels defeating, let alone a flimsy Halloween decoration that may or may not survive the season. See you another time, Skull Spider.